When you hear the word self-love the first thing that comes to mind is that it’s a selfish act however, self-love is never like that.
It’s not a state of feeling good.
It’s the state of appreciation for oneself that grows from our actions, that supports the elements of growth physically, mentally, and spiritually.
When we love ourselves we begin to accept our weakness and strengthen.
Here Are 10 Tips to Love Yourself
1- Be Mindful
Becoming mindful is the ability to know what you want, think, and feel. It’s the ability to act based on what you need not what you want, it’s the act of self-love.
Acting based on what you want comes from a temporary feeling that can lead you to make decisions that are not in your favor in the long run.
Every time you decide based on a thought you just had, think about it for a minute. Does it come from a feeling of wanting something or, is it something you need?
2- Learn The Art of Self Care
Self-care is not for fancy women, it’s for everyone. Having a proper self-care is more about giving time to love yourself even more, and doing the things you love.
Set at least 10 minutes a day to just do what you love: It could be reading, walking, or playing with your pet, it could be anything that will make you appreciate and love yourself for taking time for doing the things you love.
3- Set Boundaries
Boundaries are set to sustain a healthy lifestyle and loving yourself even more. It’s a skill that not many are taught how to do, and It’s more about knowing your limits.
First, you need to be aware of where you stand, consider what makes you tolerate certain interactions or situations, as opposed to the things that make you uncomfortable and stressed, if you can identify those then you will know your limits.
Be direct about your feelings or what makes you uncomfortable, many people come from a different background, so it’s better to be direct about your boundaries.
Not just physically but also mentally. Loving yourself comes in all shapes and forms.
Knowing when it’s enough is essential for self-love. Stay away from negativity as often as you can. But, sometimes that’s not an option, especially for highly sensitive people.
If you know a friend that is always negative and you tend to pick up on their negativity, then this exercise will help you.
First, focus on your breath for a few minutes, don’t hold your breath as this can hold the negativity to your body.
Secondly, picture the negative images as a gray fog lifting up from your body and wellness as a clear light enters your body. This will bring immediate results to protect yourself.
5- Forgive Yourself
It’s another act of self-love. Learn to forgive yourself, don’t shame yourself for the things you did in the past. It can be hard to not get upset when we think about something shameful. But, you can talk to a friend about this thing (if you are brave enough) and laugh about it together because what happened has happened.
Don’t let the past make you shame yourself, let it be a guide to your self-love because we are all human and everybody make mistakes.
6- Self-Love Jar
It’s tricky to love yourself in a certain moment, which is why it’s best to keep notes somewhere to remind yourself of the things that make you love yourself.
Each day fill a note with something you did that day, a kind action, or something you accomplished. Write it down and put each note to a jar and keep it somewhere where you can see it, mentally when you look at it, it will remind you to love yourself more.
7- Create A Journal
Everyone should have a journal, men, women, and kids. It’s a way to reflect on yourself and to remind you to love yourself. Putting down all your thoughts right in front of you will clear your head and free your mind and distress you.
There are so many benefits to owning a journal, it’s the best way to self-love.
Sit at least 30 minutes to write down whichever comes to your mind, it’s your journal there are no right or wrong ways, have fun with it.
8- Have a Relationship with Yourself
When you start to treat yourself just as you would when you love someone it creates more love for yourself. However, the way you talk with yourself seems always negative as opposed to someone you love, then you may want to consider speaking to yourself with self-love affirmations.
Daily self-love affirmations are an amazing tool to help you on your journey of self-love, you have to believe it to see it.
Self-Love Affirmations list
- I am enough
- I matter
- Today I’m learning and growing
- I have the power to change
- I’m proud of myself
Take yourself on a date, visit places on your own, walk alone, and do the things you used to do with someone by yourself. It might sound intimidating at first but you will create a room for yourself to grow and to your self-love.
9- Explore your Core Beliefs
Beliefs shape who we are, they also determine the way we view ourselves and how we eventually apply self-love to our life.
You accept core beliefs without a question, it’s deep down in your mind. But, exploring your core might help you understand why you lack self-love and to grow to self-acceptance.
They are something like this “nobody loves me” you believe it’s the truth but, it’s only like that because of your core beliefs about yourself.
A technique called downward arrow
First think about a belief about yourself it could be “I’m not loved”
Then ask yourself what does that mean to you?
It might mean that you are scared to show your true personality or people wouldn’t love you.
Ask again what does that means about you?
That could mean you that you are not worthy.
And then you want to identify those beliefs after that, you want to see how you will react if you were to break the rule of your core belief.
You can read a step by step process to change your core beliefs here
10- Ditch Perfectness
Nobody is perfect. I’m sure everybody is aware of that. But, when it comes to self-love people try to be perfect to achieve self-love.
Scenarios that come to mind are something like:
If only I had a perfect body…
Wish I never had a scar…
If only my handwriting is better…
And so on…
You don’t need to be perfect in any way to have the self-love that you want; it’s unrealistic. Instead, focus on improving what you already got and accept yourself the way you are.
Self-love Quotes (Love Yourself First)
They are like a cherry on the top.
-Self-love is not selfish; you cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself.
-Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.
-Eat like you love yourself. Move like you love yourself. Speak like you love yourself. Act like your love yourself. Love yourself.
-You were born to be real, not to be perfect.
-In order to love who you are, you cannot hate the experiences that shaped you.
-Regardless of how anyone else feels about me, I am going to choose to love myself today.
-Self-love. It doesn’t mean that everyone will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. It means that you won’t let them change the way you see yourself; nor will you stick around for them to destroy you.
-If you don’t love yourself, nobody will. Not only that, but you also won’t be good at loving anyone else. Loving starts with the self.
-I am not looking to escape my darkness, I’m learning to love myself here.
To love yourself is to understand you don’t need to be perfect to be good.